Hurry Up and Wait

"If I don't say this now I will surely break
As I'm leaving the one I want to take
Forgive the urgency but hurry up and wait
My heart has started to separate..."

-Look After You - The Fray

There are always going to be times in life where you find yourself alone and afraid. Maybe someone hurt you and there's this constant reminder of the pain, or maybe you don't need a reminder to help you remember what you or that person did.

Life has a way of keeping you on the ground. There are these moments that separate you from strength and it's often hard to find your way back to who you are. Situations start take a toll, and you become lost inside of a whirlwind of hurt that you tried so hard to avoid.

I've said in the past that pain is essential and a natural part of growth. From the weight lifter dealing with muscle pain to the teenager having growing pains (show me that smile...), pain happens.

I may be rehashing an old conversation, but it feels right to start it over. Your identity is very important. Who you are is who you become in your worst of circumstances.

It's on our knees that we can finally check the mirror to see who we've become. Who you are in your worst nightmares can be the strongest reflection of your true character.

When we are wounded, it seems natural to latch onto those around us. We grab our megaphones and scream at the top of our lungs, "DOES ANYBODY SEE ME?!?!"

Then in a low whisper...

"Can anyone help me? I need you to see that I'm hurting..."

We have a tendency to bleed on those around us. 

Open wounds are hard to recover from. Sometimes it's hard to see past the bandage to notice that the healing process is working. Healing takes time. Healing, as crazy as it may sound, can hurt worse than what caused the injury in the first place.

So where does that leave us?

At the end of the day, it's about smiling. It's not about removing memories or pain from your life, but accepting them as a part of you. It can't simply be about all of the good things that are thrown our way, there has to be room for the bad as well.

What's the cure?

Endure. Some people won't understand potential beatings you may have to take but that's probably the point. You have to make the choice that most people are too afraid or stubborn to make-the right choice.

Endurance allows for our hearts to sprout wings. I'm sure the metaphor has been used before but in our finest moments we will have learned how to fly because of all the times the wind wouldn't take.

Remember the hurt and constantly remind yourself who you are. Defeat leaves scars but victory can cleanse the soul.

For more thoughts on Pain and Healing check out my old entries:

The Cure For Pain


Are We Human?

A Change in Formula

Dream: A condition or achievement that is longed for; an aspiration. 

At my school, there is a constant conversation over the topic of dreams. It's a powerful talk and even more powerful when people become aware of their dreams.

A dream can range from an obscure idea to a very specific vision of what you wish to achieve in the future. Mine is in the middle. I wish to take a part in story through writing, one of the most powerful arts.

The thing is, I've been blessed to be a part of a dream that consists multiple people. I'm not doing this alone. Nothing is better than being able to share your dream with others. Living it through together is powerful.

Last night was a great one for me. I was brainstorming a short film idea with a close friend and it turned into something much more passionate than what appeared to be a surface concept. We continued to incorporate our very souls into this story. No story will reflect our characters more than this one will.

We spoke about what we wanted to accomplish in life and where we would be going because to be a writer you have to be consumed by your imagination. There's this sense of not being able to leave the world's you create because all you wish to do is continue to create! It makes human interaction difficult at times because you can't focus on where you are, all you can think about is the characters you're building in your mind.

Robert McKee, in his book called Story, says this:

"For we not only create stories as metaphors for life, we create them as metaphors for meaningful life-and to live meaningfully is to be at perpetual risk."

My dream is to do as this quote says. Great storytelling is to say, "life is like this______________." I get to fill in the blanks.

It may sound fun, and may sound over the top, but it's also very weighty. Dreams don't always allow you to fly. Sometimes they can leave you stranded on the ground.

So let me ask you, what are your dreams? Whether or not we actually speak about it, try to think it through. Drop logic, drop your overthinking mindset and simply dream.

What happens when you do this?

That's what I'm interested in.

-Chris Peters