I did not intend to write anything more until I followed through with my challenge I established in my previous entry, but something came up. I don't have much to say but I have to share a story and if I don't write about it now, it's not going to get done.
Tonight I went out with some friends for the first time this semester to distribute food and conversation with our friends who are homeless. There was a sense of anxiety between the group because it's been a while since we've been out there and it was a justified feeling because there were few people we knew when we got there.
It was an emotionally draining experience for me personally. Thankfully, God kept me together but I met a few women who were wasted. One woman was just drunk while the other was high and drunk. Cathy was the first woman I talked to and she had been through a lot. My heart truly went out to her as she plead for us to look out for a shelter that would take her in. She told me that she was an alcoholic but she was willing to give it up to get straight.
It's hard to believe in people, when they say they want to sober up but take gulps of their beer as they express that desire to you. It's hard to look past the pain when I am so blessed. It's hard to look people in the eye and tell them that all you can do is pray for them and listen to their problems.
I live a selfish life. God has truly blessed and it crushes me to the core when I see people in more need than me. Most of these people are on the streets for just reasons, but where are the people stepping up to take care of them?
Just because certain people deserve death, doesn't mean we should give it to them.
Another woman I met tonight made me extremely uncomfortable. She wouldn't stop touching me and a few times got right in my face. Her name was Franny and she was high/drunk and not lightly. She was messed up.
I heard her share her story about 5 times. She asked me how old I was every 10 minutes and told me she had a 25 year old daughter who lives in Arizona every 15 minutes. Her story was tragic and she was a trouble maker.
She told me she had my back and she kept telling me I was like a son to her. I had never met her before. As I sat in the ant-filled grass next to her, she would interrupt herself in the middle of a thought and ask me why I was there. She would look me in the eyes with tears forming and say why are you still here?
I couldn't answer her question although I gave her a different one every time.
At one point I just told her I felt that God wanted me here whereas another time I just said, I'm just here.
It seems selfish to me that I feel hurt when I see other's pain but that's what happens sometimes.
Empathy is a powerful emotion that we all should latch onto every now and again. But empathy can only get you so far without action. Without acting upon those empathy it turns into is pity.
Life can be precious but it kill you at times. When you see other people who are worse off than you, it serves as a reminder that you're well taken care of.
I have another challenge.
Think about your life.
Think about who you are.
Think about the most painful experience you've ever been in.
Think about losing someone or something that you treasured.
Think about all of the times you could've been there for a friend but you didn't show up.
Now stop thinking about things and be somebody.
Be somebody that will make a difference in the world.
Be somebody that will bring change to those around you.
Be somebody that people look up to.
Lead.
Love.
Learn.
Live.
Greatness is something that has to be forced out of people at times. It's not something that comes naturally to anyone, but when it is unleashed everyone else better stand back out of the way because you will become a force to be reckoned with.
Let's grow together and live together. Life should not be tried alone.
No comments:
Post a Comment