The Soul's Outlet

They painted up your secrets
With the lies they told to you
And the least they ever gave you
Was the most you ever knew

Your voice is small and fading
And you hide in here unknown

And I wonder where these dreams go
When the world gets in your way
What's the point in all this screaming
No one's listening anyway

-Acoustic # 3 by The Goo Goo Dolls ( rearranged for relevance)

Have you ever found yourself in a setting where a question was asked, and you just want to scream out your answer with a passionate fire, yet you say nothing? In fact, not only do you do nothing, you feel like your very being is more meaningless than it ever was before.

I think at some point in everyone's life they have this moment where they are looking for their voice. And I don't mean to say that like a cheesy Disney film starring Hilary Duff or Miley Cyrus about facing your destiny in music, singing at the top of your lungs while discovering the best of both worlds (Film Idea!).

What I'm talking about is this desire to be heard. Within each of us is this passion of discovery. Most journey's start with a question of your own character.

Who Am I, really?

Great adventure relies on the need of self-discovery.

I once heard that the notion of "finding yourself" is a ridiculous one, and I agree with it. You are who you are in the present. You can dream about who you will become in the future and dread who you were in the past, but ultimately your heart is seen in the here and now.

One of the most devastating things in life is to go through it without ever truly discovering your voice. I understand those with an introverted nature. I'm one of you.

You're my people!

Have you ever been asked a question that you have an answer to, but someone else (mother, father, brother, sister, friend) answered for you?

I grew up with my father answering for me, and it wasn't his fault. I was just plain shy. I understand the intimidation of a parental figure. It wasn't until college that I truly started to ask the question of who I am. I dabbled with the thoughts  in high school, but I really started to focus in on who I was when my freshman year came about.

I used to hide behind my father's voice, and if you don't know him, I love my dad. Every now and again he'll try to answer for me, and I'll yell at him. "Dad, I got this one...actually what he said sounds good, yeah fries and a coke. Thanks."

All throughout life we hear voices. We hear from our parents, peers, media, church, the school system, and they are all telling us different things at times. What you have to realize is that there is merit to all of them, but at the end of the day the voice that matters isn't any of these listed.

There are two voices you should be concerned with and one of them is your own.

I'm sure this is confusing, so allow me to pose a few questions.


How do I find my voice?

Well first off, stop talking and listen. Search deep within your soul and find that locked door. Maybe you locked it, maybe someone else did, but you'll hear someone hitting the door from the inside screaming for you to let them out!

It should sound like you.


How do I unlock the door?

I don't have an answer. It's different for everyone. Generally speaking, it all comes down to overcoming your fears and insecurities. It's about finding that place where you get over, what everyone else thinks and then you are able to share with others.

Now, you're free, but that's not the end of it. Just because you now have an idea of what you believe, that doesn't mean you'll be able to articulate it. This is probably the hardest part. Getting over your fear of what others think about you. I'm not saying that you have to be a jerk, God knows there are too many of those in the world.

What I'm saying is that what people think about you, is a pointless fear to have because deep down they are just as screwed up and stupid as you (think) you are.

Your voice is an outlet for the soul.

It can be found through many things. You can literally speak, you can write, you can sing, you can play an instrument, you can have a heart to heart with someone, etc. Overall, life is too precious to go through without knowing who you are and want you want, and whether or not you'd be willing to sacrifice for the betterment of others.


The first step to finding your voice:


1. Forget everything you know about yourself and start over.